When we dig deep into topics from Scripture that affect our lives today as women of faith, big questions tend to surface. Thankfully, our mighty God is faithful to guide us with wisdom and insight as we bring those big questions to him.

Relationships can be difficult at times. They can also be a great blessing, so learning to navigate the intricacies of relationship dynamics is important to our spiritual growth.

Many of us have experienced periods of separation from family members or friends. When the estrangement lingers and there seems to be no solution in sight, what do we do? Can God restore the relationship? How do we pray for broken relationships?

Our Heavenly Father is a God of restoration. When we look at Romans 5:10, we see that God restored our relationship to Him through the death and resurrection of His son, Jesus Christ.

“For since our friendship with God was restored by the death of his Son while we were still his enemies, we will certainly be saved through the life of his Son. We were enemies of God through sin. And through Jesus God restored our relationship to Him.” Romans 5:10 NLT

So yes, God can restore relationships, and restoration is part of His plan.

But we need to remember that God’s ways are far beyond our own. He is the Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end. (Revelations 22:13)

There are 3 things to consider as we bring our requests to God and ask him to restore a relationship: God desires to restore relationships according to His way, in His timing, and for His purposes.

God desires to restore relationships His way.

We have our own reasons for wanting a relationship restored. Estrangement hurts. Long periods of time away from family or friends causes an emptiness we cannot fill on our own. We wonder why, and the not knowing adds to the agony.

We try to take control of the situation and resolve it on our own. But we also know, we cannot control our loved one’s actions or decisions. We want to reconcile so badly, that we’re willing to do anything to make it happen!

God’s Word reminds us that if we will take a step back, and let him work it out His way, not only does He get glorified, but it always turns out better than when we try to fix it. Whether we see change happening our not, we can trust our Heavenly Father’s plan. He is always working everything together for our good.

God will also keep us away from harm for our own protection and spiritual growth. We can trust His promises, and also His process.

God desires to restore in His timing.

God’s timing is so vastly different from our own, that we can’t even fathom it.

I once heard a story from a precious woman who was estranged from her father for many years. As he lay in his hospital bed nearing death, she was able to visit with him, and they both took hold of the opportunity to seek each other’s forgiveness and reconcile. This woman could have chosen to harbor bitterness over the years lost, but instead she chose to rejoice in their reconciliation.

When we choose to trust God’s timing instead of our own, we will find renewed peace in God’s sovereignty where our relationships are concerned.

God desires to see restoration for His purposes.

We know that God works all things together for good to those who love Him and are called according to His purpose. (Romans 8:28) That tells us God is working everything together for our good right now, even when we’re struggling with estrangement from someone we love.

If we’ve been praying for restoration and it hasn’t happened yet, we can trust in God’s promises for us as his beloved children. He will show us the right path.

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take.” (Proverbs 3:5-6)

When the sting of separation from a family member or dear friend leaves a gaping hole in our hearts, it’s hard to keep hoping. God has much to say about hope. Hope is one of our greatest gifts from him.

Hope will breathe life into our day when we feel empty or lonely from seeking reconciliation. But expectations can be exhausting. Expectations can create a weight we weren’t meant to carry, while hope offers relief as we trust God with the outcome.

Have you been in a season of estrangement from a family member or friend and wondering if God will restore that relationship? Let the following prayer guide you into a closer walk with your Heavenly Father. He loves you with an everlasting love. Let’s pray together.

A Prayer to Reconcile with Estranged Family or Friends

Dear Heavenly Father,

Thank you for _________. (Your loved one’s name here.) I know you love them even more than I do, and I pray you will lead us toward reconciliation in our relationship. We have been estranged, but you are a God who can restore what was broken. Renew our hearts and help us both to seek you continually. If either of us has wandered away from you, draw us back with your unfailing love and tender mercy. I trust you and believe in your power to reunite me with ________.

Your ways are perfect, and so is your timing. Even when I can’t see it, you are working in the waiting. Reconciliation often takes time. Help me demonstrate love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control as I wait for you. (Galatians 5:22-23) During this season of waiting, please protect _______ from enemy attacks and be their ever-present help in time of need. (Psalm 46:1)

You have shown through your Word how much you love family bonds. Scripture declares, “As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.” (Joshua 24:15) When I speak these words over my own home, help me to live out their meaning with grace and truth.

You are a God who loves connection. You sent your son Jesus to be with your children, spend time with them, and build relationships. Give me wisdom specifically for this estranged relationship. Help me discern when to reach out and when to stay silent.

I will rest in the promise of Proverbs 3:5-6, seeking your will as you show me the path to take. I will continue to pray with hope, while also realizing I cannot control another person’s decisions or actions. Help me to know when to hold on and when to let go. I trust you with the outcome.

Relationships with family and friends are not easy, but as long as I keep my focus on you, I know you will work all things together for my good. That doesn’t mean everything between me and _____ will always be good, but that you can bring beauty from ashes.

Thank you for the blessings of the relationships in my life. Thank you for the hope of reconciliation, the joy of family and friends, and the peace that comes through your precious son, Jesus. Amen.

Disclaimer: Today’s post is offered as a short study about restoration and is not intended as professional advice for relationship counseling. If you or someone you know is in a harmful relationship, please seek out a local ministry or counseling center for help. You can also find help at Focus on the Family by clicking here.

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Want to study more about what the Bible says about restoration? Check out this popular post with a more in-depth look at God’s restoration promises.

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Lately I’ve had to ask God some hard questions. The ones that seem to surface in the midst of great struggle, and I feel like I need answers if I’m going to have any hope of getting through it.

Maybe you’ve been there, too— in a place where hard questions consume your thoughts. And maybe like me, you’ve spent a lot of time trying to figure out the answers on your own when you know deep down God wants us to bring our hard questions to him.

Usually these types of questions come to mind when a desperate prayer goes unanswered, or when God doesn’t answer the way I wanted. So I’m learning to trust God with my questions, because I know from past experience, when hard questions come, I can either pull away from God or draw closer to him.

Taking Our Hardest Questions to God When We’re Hurting

When we’re hurting, we want to ask, “Why did this happen?”

Whether walking through grief, battling discouragement, or falling into despair, I used to hesitate before asking God my hardest questions. I thought about them constantly but stopped short of bringing them before God. I thought that questioning my circumstances would somehow disrespect him.

Well-meaning people of faith have tried to rationalize things we don’t understand by saying things like, “We shouldn’t question it, because he’s God and we’re not.” But I’ve never found comfort in that answer. Instead, it made me feel like my God was unapproachable. That I needed to just accept the fact that he would do what he wanted, and if I questioned it, that meant I didn’t have faith.

But I discovered the blessed truth is, God longs for us to come to him. With our concerns, doubts, and even our questions. He wants us to seek him at all times.

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” Matthew 11:28 NIV

In the above verse, the Greek word for burdened is phortizō, meaning “to load down with a burden.” Maybe you’ve felt loaded down with the burden of unanswered prayer. Maybe tragedy struck and you’re struggling to understand how God could let it happen.

Jesus offered something in Matthew 11 no one else can give. He offered the gift of rest for our weariness, and it’s still available to us today. But we cannot experience rest if we’re weighed down with our hard questions.

Why I Need to Take My Questions to God in Prayer

If I tell God I’m angry, will he be mad at me?

After my dearest friend passed away a few years ago, I sat at my dining room table ready to have a discussion with the Lord. Anger over losing my friend welled up inside.

I’d paced around the house for days, rehearsing my pain as I talked to myself about everything I didn’t understand. How could this happen? Why did our prayers for her healing go unanswered? How will her family and friends go on without her?

By the time I decided to talk to God about it, I’d worked myself into a frenzy of raw emotion. But as I released it all to him, I sensed his presence wrapping me in a loving embrace. God didn’t get mad; he understood like no one else could.

“Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.” Psalm 23:4

That’s when I realized, it’s good to ask God my hard questions. Comforting, even. Talking to myself or screaming those questions to the universe only leads to emptiness.

The universe can’t answer back, but having a conversation with God about my deepest hurts brings healing.

His holy answers give me hope. And even if God doesn’t answer right away, he wraps me in his loving care while I wait.

How to Ask God Our Hard Questions

One of my favorite ways to bring my hard questions to God is through journaling.

Lately I’ve spent my mornings writing down question after question in my journal. Struggles abound as I grieve a loved one’s recent passing. My mind reels with runaway thoughts.

By taking a few quiet moments to write them down, I’m preparing my heart to receive the answers God will provide.

The more time I spend in God’s Word, the easier it is to hear his voice.

So when we come to him with those hard questions, we need to also commit to spending time reading Scripture. God often speaks by bringing snippets of verses to mind— phrases or main ideas of what we've read before. Even if we don’t recall the exact reference of the Scripture, or the word-for-word translation.

God doesn’t need perfection, only our willingness to listen in his presence.

However we choose to come to God with our hard questions, the important thing is to remain near to him through it all and not push him away. We don’t need to fear how he will respond or think we should hold back our true feelings from him. God can take it.

Life is filled with hardship, and questions are certain to come. Without God, our most difficult questions may guide us into uncertainty, angst, and hopelessness. They will pull us toward a pit of despair and away from his gentle embrace. But the good news is that it’s never too late to return to him.

Our loving Father is always ready to hear from us, with arms open wide, and he will provide a safe shelter where our questions are welcomed and grace is available.