The other night I had a dream. In the dream, one of my adult kids came to me with news I absolutely did not want to hear. I could feel myself about to overreact.

In the dream, steam shot from my ears as my head felt like it would explode! I screamed in the loudest voice I could muster. It was like an over-the-top, out-of-control overreaction.

I remember waking up thinking what a funny dream it was. Too much chips and salsa, most likely. Then God began searching my heart in that gentle way He has, bringing back to mind memories of times past when I’d overreacted to something my kids needed to tell me.

I’ve shared with you before about my struggle with letting go of frustration. I also shared how I thought I’d conquered it when I learned to control my mouth. But I discovered keeping frustration inside doesn’t deal with the problem. It only gives it a place to grow.

A Verse for Those of Us Prone to Overreacting

I don’t want my loved ones to be afraid to tell me something because they don’t know how I will react. I want to be the person they can trust. The one they can come to in times of trouble - a safe place.

So how do I get rid of my constant overreacting? How do I become the person my family knows they can come to with their problems?

I will find peace from overreacting when I stop giving frustration a safe harbor in my heart.

“Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” Proverbs 4:23 NIV

This one verse from Proverbs reminds us that we have the power to control what we allow in our hearts.

We often tuck our frustrated feelings away for safekeeping. And when we do, those feelings grow stronger. The problem is, whatever I stuff into my heart will eventually flow out of it. All that yuck spews out on the people closest to us, but it doesn’t have to be that way.

We can learn to guard our hearts, like in today’s verse. We can fill our hearts with good things and force frustration to find another harbor. The safe place we create can be reserved for our people. Our families and friends. When they perceive us as a safe place, they will feel free to come to us with their deepest hurts, biggest dreams, and everything in between.

If you’ve struggled with overreacting, I’m right there with you. Maybe you’ve prayed in the past for victory over lashing out, but haven’t felt freedom from your compulsion to overreact. Friend, let’s start again. I believe in us!

With God’s help, we can find that freedom we long for and become the parents, wives, and friends God created us to be.

Want more resources to help you let go of frustration? Grab your free download of these one-sentence prayer cards. Click the image below to get access!

It amazes me how easily I can fall back into a pattern of focusing on the negative. It just seems to be the way of life these days. Arguing, fussing, and frustration abound while pointing out the good in our lives takes a back seat. I’d like to say I’ve overcome the urge to dwell on the negative, but that wouldn’t be true. Lately I’ve been the first one to raise her guilty hand. The first one to break into a fit of complaining.

So when negativity sneaks in, how do we stay content? How do we “learn to be content” like Paul did?

Now I’ll admit, I do have some control over my complaining. I know this because I’ve managed to keep negative thoughts off social media and out of public. I’m able to resist griping at the grumpy lady at Walmart or shaking my fist at the distracted driver next to me. But get me in the privacy of my own home or in the comfortable presence of family and friends, and it’s a whole different story.

Somehow I’ve let my home become a safe landing place for negativity, but that’s not what God wants for me, my home, or my family. He wants me to have peace, joy, and the comfort of his Holy Spirit.

“I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.” Philippians 4:11 NIV

When difficult things come at us from all directions, it’s hard to fathom the kind of contentment Paul describes in Philippians chapter 4. We want to discover how to be content, like Paul talks about, but you might be asking yourself, “How can I be content with all the stuff going on in my life right now? With everything I’ve been through?”

No one understood the struggle for contentment more than Paul, and from his letter to the church at Philippi, we can be reassured today. Learning how to be content is possible, whatever problems we may be facing.

Discovering the Contentment Paul Describes

Paul’s sense of peace can be felt in reading these final words to the Philippians. I can almost hear his sigh of satisfaction as he gives the last charge to his friends.

Rejoice.

Give thanks.

Rely on God’s peace.

Think about good things.

This is profound advice, but even more so when we realize where they came from. Paul had been through some tough stuff - worse than many of us will ever experience. Yet because of that we can take comfort in knowing his words come from a place of having been there.

We may find it hard to listen to someone who can’t identify with our circumstances. That’s one reason this verse holds such power. Paul understood, but he didn’t just say, “Me too.” He encouraged us all by letting us know if he could do it, we could too.

The Secret to Being Content

Looking just a bit further into the chapter, Paul reveals the secret to true contentment. (Which isn’t really a secret at all.)

“I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength.” Philippians 4:12-13 (Emphasis mine.)

He gives us the answer in bold declaration. It isn’t in God’s character to hide the truth from us, or make us scrounge for what we hope for. The message is simple, delivered through a trusted servant of Christ. The answer is this:

Learning to be content begins with letting Jesus be my strength.

Contentment is a tricky thing - at least, we can make it that way. And God knew we couldn’t find it alone. We would need help, which He generously provided. Jesus longs to be our strength, and to help us find contentment when we struggle to do it on our own.

So when I start to fall back into that old pattern of negativity and complaining takes the place of speaking God’s praise, I have hope. In verse 18 Paul says, “I am amply supplied…” He had what he needed, and that was enough.

May we all find strength through Jesus today to see we are amply supplied with God’s goodness. And may we trade negativity for a content-filled life.

Blessings,

Kristine