Can God Restore My Relationship?

When we dig deep into topics from Scripture that affect our lives today as women of faith, big questions tend to surface. Thankfully, our mighty God is faithful to guide us with wisdom and insight as we bring those big questions to him.

Relationships can be difficult at times. They can also be a great blessing, so learning to navigate the intricacies of relationship dynamics is important to our spiritual growth.

Many of us have experienced periods of separation from family members or friends. When the estrangement lingers and there seems to be no solution in sight, what do we do? Can God restore the relationship? How do we pray for broken relationships?

Our Heavenly Father is a God of restoration. When we look at Romans 5:10, we see that God restored our relationship to Him through the death and resurrection of His son, Jesus Christ. 

“For since our friendship with God was restored by the death of his Son while we were still his enemies, we will certainly be saved through the life of his Son. We were enemies of God through sin. And through Jesus God restored our relationship to Him.” Romans 5:10 NLT

So yes, God can restore relationships, and restoration is part of His plan.

But we need to remember that God’s ways are far beyond our own. He is the Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end. (Revelations 22:13)

There are 3 things to consider as we bring our requests to God and ask him to restore a relationship: God desires to restore relationships according to His way, in His timing, and for His purposes.

God desires to restore relationships His way.

We have our own reasons for wanting a relationship restored. Estrangement hurts. Long periods of time away from family or friends causes an emptiness we cannot fill on our own. We wonder why, and the not knowing adds to the agony.

We try to take control of the situation and resolve it on our own. But we also know, we cannot control our loved one’s actions or decisions. We want to reconcile so badly, that we’re willing to do anything to make it happen!

God’s Word reminds us that if we will take a step back, and let him work it out His way, not only does He get glorified, but it always turns out better than when we try to fix it. Whether we see change happening our not, we can trust our Heavenly Father’s plan. He is always working everything together for our good.

God will also keep us away from harm for our own protection and spiritual growth. We can trust His promises, and also His process.

God desires to restore in His timing.

God’s timing is so vastly different from our own, that we can’t even fathom it.

I once heard a story from a precious woman who was estranged from her father for many years. As he lay in his hospital bed nearing death, she was able to visit with him, and they both took hold of the opportunity to seek each other’s forgiveness and reconcile. This woman could have chosen to harbor bitterness over the years lost, but instead she chose to rejoice in their reconciliation.

When we choose to trust God’s timing instead of our own, we will find renewed peace in God’s sovereignty where our relationships are concerned.

God desires to see restoration for His purposes.

We know that God works all things together for good to those who love Him and are called according to His purpose. (Romans 8:28) That tells us God is working everything together for our good right now, even when we’re struggling with estrangement from someone we love. 

If we’ve been praying for restoration and it hasn’t happened yet, we can trust in God’s promises for us as his beloved children. He will show us the right path.

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take.” (Proverbs 3:5-6)

When the sting of separation from a family member or dear friend leaves a gaping hole in our hearts, it’s hard to keep hoping. God has much to say about hope. Hope is one of our greatest gifts from him.

Hope will breathe life into our day when we feel empty or lonely from seeking reconciliation. But expectations can be exhausting. Expectations can create a weight we weren’t meant to carry, while hope offers relief as we trust God with the outcome.


Have you been in a season of estrangement from a family member or friend and wondering if God will restore that relationship? Let the following prayer guide you into a closer walk with your Heavenly Father. He loves you with an everlasting love. Let’s pray together.


A Prayer to Reconcile with Estranged Family or Friends

Dear Heavenly Father,

Thank you for _________. (Your loved one’s name here.) I know you love them even more than I do, and I pray you will lead us toward reconciliation in our relationship. We have been estranged, but you are a God who can restore what was broken. Renew our hearts and help us both to seek you continually. If either of us has wandered away from you, draw us back with your unfailing love and tender mercy. I trust you and believe in your power to reunite me with ________.

Your ways are perfect, and so is your timing. Even when I can’t see it, you are working in the waiting. Reconciliation often takes time. Help me demonstrate love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control as I wait for you. (Galatians 5:22-23) During this season of waiting, please protect _______ from enemy attacks and be their ever-present help in time of need. (Psalm 46:1)

You have shown through your Word how much you love family bonds. Scripture declares, “As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.” (Joshua 24:15) When I speak these words over my own home, help me to live out their meaning with grace and truth.

You are a God who loves connection. You sent your son Jesus to be with your children, spend time with them, and build relationships. Give me wisdom specifically for this estranged relationship. Help me discern when to reach out and when to stay silent. 

I will rest in the promise of Proverbs 3:5-6, seeking your will as you show me the path to take. I will continue to pray with hope, while also realizing I cannot control another person’s decisions or actions. Help me to know when to hold on and when to let go. I trust you with the outcome. 

Relationships with family and friends are not easy, but as long as I keep my focus on you, I know you will work all things together for my good. That doesn’t mean everything between me and _____ will always be good, but that you can bring beauty from ashes.

Thank you for the blessings of the relationships in my life. Thank you for the hope of reconciliation, the joy of family and friends, and the peace that comes through your precious son, Jesus. Amen.

Disclaimer: Today’s post is offered as a short study about restoration and is not intended as professional advice for relationship counseling. If you or someone you know is in a harmful relationship, please seek out a local ministry or counseling center for help. You can also find help at Focus on the Family by clicking here.

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Want to study more about what the Bible says about restoration? Check out this popular post with a more in-depth look at God’s restoration promises.

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Letting Go Of Control

The stench hit in waves when we walked through the front door. I can’t quite describe it, but trust me. It was bad. The waves grew stronger as we moved closer to the kitchen.

What on earth could cause such a rancid smell?

We searched the house. We deep cleaned. We asked for advice, even though it was totally embarrassing asking about possible sources for a nasty smell in our house, and how to get rid of it. 

Letting Go Of Control

Through our top-notch detective work, we finally concluded the smell must be coming from a poor critter who somehow got inside our walls. We live near a lake, so it isn’t unusual to see frequent visitors such as mice, squirrels, snakes, and more. Unfortunately, one such visitor must’ve found a way in and gotten trapped.

There are a few problems that arise when this happens.

Number one: finding the critter.

Number two: figuring out how to get it out.

Number three: finding where it got in, so it doesn’t happen again.

With the help of professionals, we checked one and two off our list. Number three proved to be a huge problem that persisted for months and months. No matter how hard we tried, we could not find where they were getting in, which resulted in more stinks, more money, and more frustration.

It became a joke among family and friends. We’d never heard of anyone having such problems with dead critters! Let’s just say family get-togethers for sure weren’t happening at our house. But even though I tried to keep a light-hearted attitude about it, my patience wore thin. I was determined to solve this problem, but it was beyond my grasp.

Image reads "Letting Go Of Control" shows a woman feeling free.
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 I felt like I was fighting nature, and nature was winning. Finally I threw my hands in the air and thought, “Forget it. I can’t figure it out. I’ll just live with a stinky house forever!”

I decided to let go of control because I’d become exhausted by my efforts.

Which is exactly what I needed to do all along - let go of control.

Why do we like to be in control?


There are many reasons why we get caught in the control trap. We may feel a deep sense of satisfaction from being needed or valued. Control can also provide temporary relief when we face uncertainty. We feel like if we keep control of our situation, we won’t have to ask ourselves all those what-if questions.

What if it doesn’t turn out the way I expected?

What if something bad happens?

What if I make things worse?

How to give control to God

I know I’m supposed to give my problems to God and trust Him with the answers. I love the message in 1 Peter 5:7, “Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.” (NIV) Yet when it comes to my daily life, I still struggle to turn it over to Him. I feel like my way will work best, and I forget the most important truth.

Whatever the reason we like to be in control, we have hope today. Hope for when that cycle of control results in ugly things like frustration, overwhelm, and burnout.

 A verse to remember when I'm caught in the control trap.

 “Yours, O Lord, is the greatness, the power, the glory, the victory, and the majesty. Everything in the heavens and on earth is yours, O Lord, and this is your kingdom. We adore you as the one who is over all things.” 1 Chronicles 29:11 NLT

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When we're tempted to take control, let's remember this. God is over ALL  things.

Reading the verse above makes me think of miracle stories in the Bible when God showed Himself powerful and sovereign in the lives of His people. Times like when He parted the Red Sea when the walls of Jericho came down, and when Sarah became pregnant in her old age.

 But God’s greatness, power, glory, victory, and majesty apply to my everyday life too. Not just the big things, but the not-so-exciting moments as well. (Even stinky critter moments.) Remembering that God is over ALL things in our lives helps us cast our cares on Him, knowing He is the one in control.

Let Go Of The Need To Control

I stopped worrying about rodents in the walls. Instead, I chose to focus on God’s goodness. I praised Him for our home, which I’d forgotten to do in the midst of the chaos. And you know what? The problem ended. No more stink.

We don’t know how it happened, but we don’t need to know. This is God’s kingdom, and everything in it belongs to Him. When we remind ourselves of His sovereignty in our lives, we begin our journey of letting Him have control.