This time of year brings to mind memories of childhood Christmases. The pattern in our house rarely changed from year to year, and I loved it. I would anticipate every second, from munching on crunchy party mix at my dad’s house on Christmas Eve, to playing in the backyard at my aunt and uncle’s on Christmas afternoon.
I always knew what to expect, and I thrived on the predictability of it all.
I don’t know how my parents managed to pull it off, with the challenges divorce can bring. But somehow they did. I felt safe knowing what our holidays had in store.
As a wife, mom, stepmom, and step-Mimi, holidays have been a bit more unexpected, and sometimes even unpredictable.
For years I tried to create a Christmas season our family could count on and look forward to each year. But outside factors and challenges always seemed to interrupt my best laid plans.
Frustration and bitterness have a way of surfacing in times like this, when lost expectations cause me to feel like my holiday isn’t good enough. Whether I’m comparing my plans to years past, or to friends’ posts on social media. With a simple scroll, I can easily become overwhelmed with pic after pic of recipes, decorations, and family outings that put my spur-of-the-moment schedule to shame.
When we’re tempted to compare our holidays, we risk losing the mountain of blessings right where we are. Expectations of what we long for become the enemy of what we already have. But God offers a better way.
“Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content.” Philippians 4:11
Expectations can push contentment into the shadows, but God renews our contentment with the light of each new day.
I’m learning to be content with my circumstances and schedule through Thanksgiving and Christmas. Even when they take an abrupt turn. In fact, our current circumstances will have an effect on my ability to plan, go, and do as much as I’d like through this year’s holiday season. But when disappointment tries to creep in, I will remind myself of God’s promise to me. His presence is always here when we choose to focus on him. He will fill us with joy and peace through the holidays.
Our holiday doesn’t have to be perfect to be wonderful.
With this in mind, you may be thinking, “But my holiday can’t be wonderful. Not this year. Too much has happened.”
I am right there with you. I am, and I understand. May I share something with you? One thing I’ve learned is this…
We can let a diagnosis, grief, or hurt determine our path for the days ahead. Or, we can allow it to draw us into the throne-room of grace, where mercy, hope, and healing reside.
We have a choice for this holiday and those that follow, as well. May we find the strength and solace in Christ to take all the comparison, expectation, disappointment, and frustration and cast it away. Let’s live in the moment, right now, where we are. Whatever our circumstances.
I am praying each of us has a wonderful, imperfect, unexpected, sometimes painful but always grace-filled holiday season.
To discover more about letting go of comparison and embracing God’s plan, visit the Over It book page here.