Fear Fighting: When You’ve Lost Sight of Yourself

Sometimes I get a wonderful opportunity to meet someone truly genuine. When I meet a writer who fits that description, I like to share her words here with you. My friend Kelly is a gem. She is authentic and real, and she knows how to share God's Word in a fresh new way. I am honored to join in announcing the release of her book, Fear Fighting. Kelly is sharing a little about it here for us today...

I stand agitated and angry; I made him upset yet again.
I stand bare and defenseless, saying, "What can I do to make you happy?"
I stand exposed and exiled, "I will never be enough for you."

I stand stripped and pleading, "Whatever you want me to be, I can be, you will see.
I stand raw and helpless; I am not liked me for me.
I stand before people knowing, they want to use me.

I stand before the playground mother thinking, "I talk too much, speak too quickly, she hates me."
I stand before injurers declaring, “I am not worth hurting again.”

I take a big stand. I morph into the woman that man wants me to be. I smile when I am supposed to. Hold the doors like a good girl. And, offer to help when appropriate. I do what people need me to do.

Yet, the scary part is - I stand before myself and realize I don't even know me. 

With all my proving and posturing, I’ve lost me. Somewhere I’ve vanished.

Have you? Have you gotten lost somewhere behind the grand persona you project? Are people demanding you be someone you are not?

It’s easy to blame. The fact of the matter, however, is - blame is the biggest inhibitor to change. I don’t want to get so worried about changing them – I never change me. I’ve done that for so long.

What I want to do, is get so open to letting God change me, he rearranges me in new freedom. In a freedom where I am fearless and hopeful and graceful. Where man doesn’t dictate who I am, but where man is the object of all the love I have. There is a difference there.

This is why I wrote the book, Fear Fighting: Awakening Courage to Overcome Your Fears. It was my freedom-call to God.

So much, I’m finding, of battling against fear, is about submitting your heart to God. This verse summarizes it well: Humble yourselves, therefore, under God's mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. (1 Pet. 5:6)

When you get low below God, all he has moves over you. Some of it sinks into you.

This is what I’ve found. Less am I filling other people’s gaps and more am I going to God to fill mine.

What about you? Where is your love sourced from – a place of pleasing man or pleasing God?

Wherever you stand today, God’s grace stands taller, higher and wider. It is never too early or too late to start Fear Fighting. Learn the power of God’s love, the strength of his truth and the depths of new courage he wants to pour out on you.
 

Interested in fighting fear? Join the 4 Days to Fearless Challenge!

Author and Speaker, Kelly Balarie didn’t always fight fear – for a large part of her life, she was controlled by it. Yet, in her book, Fear Fighting: Awakening Courage to Overcome Your Fears, with God, Kelly charts a new course. Join Kelly, on the journey to go and grow with Christ’s bravery, the Spirit’s counsel and God’s unending love that squelches fear. This book reads like a love letter from God, while offering practical heart-calming prayers, anxiety-reducing tips, and courage-building decrees that will transform your day. www.fearfightingbook.com

Kelly is both a Cheerleader of Faith and a Fighter of Fear. She leans on the power of God, rests on the shoulder of Christ, and discovers how to glow in the dark places of life. Get all Kelly’s blog posts by email or visit her on her blog, Purposeful Faith. You can also find a variety of resources for your fight against fear here.  

 

3 Benefits of Christmas Countdowns

December 1st, 2004 – the day a Christmas tradition began for the Brown household. Our son unwrapped his early gift with the excitement of, well, a preschooler with a new present! It wasn’t just a gift for him, although he definitely saw it that way.

The ripped paper revealed a Lego Advent calendar set, one of many in the years to come. This quickly became his favorite activity of the season.

I know what you’re thinking. A Lego calendar? What’s spiritual about that? And you’re right. You won’t find any references to Legos in the Bible, but it wasn’t about the Legos at all. It was about what we found in the month of December that had been missing from our family life.

Through this simple version of an Advent calendar, our family found the benefits of counting down the days until Christmas.

I’d like to share three of those benefits with you here, along with links to Advent countdown ideas for you and your family. I pray these will bless you and help you develop new traditions, or maybe even revive old ones this year.

1. Counting down ensures my kids will get a few minutes each day of my undivided attention.

The holiday season brings with it joy, peace, and love. It also brings hectic schedules, commitments, and rushed days. Even though we think we are focusing on family time, in reality we may be focusing on deadlines and preparations instead.

In the mix of all the chaos, that highly sought-after family time can get swept aside.

When we start each morning or end each evening with a fun family activity, the tone of the entire day changes. Imagine our kids’ smiles when they wake up each December day ready to spend ten minutes with Mom or Dad. No cell phones, no tablets, just ten minutes to discover something special together!

My friend Lisa wrote a wonderful book called Countdown to Christmas: Unwrap the Christmas Story with Your Family in 15 Days. I read it last year, and highly recommend it. It is simple enough for the youngest children to enjoy, yet it also digs deep into Scripture for older children and grown-ups.

A simple moment set aside for gathering together lets our kids know we value time with them above anything else on our to-do lists. As a result, they will look forward to that time most of all.

2. Counting down builds our anticipation.

Christmastime is a favorite holiday for many reasons. It is special because we get to celebrate the birth of our Savior. We proclaim his Name in songs. We reconnect with his peace. We give because He gave everything so we could have the promise of eternal life.

And even though we celebrate on December 25th, something inspiring happens the first time we spot Christmas decorations popping up in stores at the beginning of November. Our hearts swell. Our anticipation builds.

Maybe it’s because we want the joy to last more than a day. Maybe we hope festive attitudes will replace all the hate and hurt going on in the world. Whatever the reason, we want the holiday to start early and end late. We want it to last and last.

Countdowns and Advent calendars help us make the most of every day, focusing on each reason to celebrate.

If you’re a crafty person like my friend Liz, you might like creating your own. Liz has a beautiful Advent calendar craft that counts down the days of December with the Names of Jesus. What better way to prepare our hearts for Christmas than studying all He means to us? For more on Liz’s Advent calendar craft, click this link.

3. Counting down strengthens our faith.

As we plan time with our families, let’s remember to set aside a few moments for our own quiet time with God.

A daily countdown serves as a reliable reminder to refocus each day on the reason we celebrate.

To guide your quiet time with God this season, how about an Advent Prayer Journal? Check out author Kathryn Shirey for prayer resources. God has given Kathryn a heart for helping others strengthen their prayer life, and her books on prayer have been a blessing to me. I know the Advent journal will bless you too.

However you choose to count down the days to Christmas this year, I pray God’s blessing over the time you reserve for honoring Him. May your family experience Jesus’ love and mercy this Christmas.

Kristine