When Being Busy Makes You Feel Valued

I love feeling needed. It brings a sense of purpose when my son asks for advice or when my husband gushes compliments over the dinner I cooked. 

But what happens when no one asks for my help?

The older my kids get, the less useful I feel. Does that mean I have no value? Absolutely not! Our identity comes from our merciful Savior. God defines who we are through his love. 

How Wanting to Be Needed Affects Our Identity 

God gave each of us unique gifts and talents. He also offers opportunities for us to use those gifts to serve the world around us. When we put our skills into action, we can laser-focus on that purpose. But we need to be careful of only thinking we have value when others need us. 

Let’s face it. Serving others makes us feel all warm inside. Especially when we’re helping our family or friends. It’s easy to mistake those feelings of fulfillment for something else. 

This happens when we let our good works determine our worth.

The Danger of Attaching My Value to My Busyness 

It’s in our nature as Type-A women to want to be helpful. So often we see someone struggling and know with a little effort, we can get the job done. We may even step in when God asked us to wait. (I for one have a hard time resisting the urge to help God!)

As much as we love doing good works, God is much more interested in His work in us. 

“For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.” (Ephesians 2:10 ESV) 

The above verse reminds us that even though God created us for good works, our worth is found in who we are through Him. When we remain in that truth, our good works will shine with the goodness of Christ. 

Whatever is causing you to feel less needed today, my go-getter friend, God knows. He wants us to help others, but He also wants us to know our worth is based on who He is, not what we do. So when our kids, families, or friends don’t need our help, we won’t feel like no one values us. 

We can fight off the fear of not being needed by reminding ourselves of our identity as children of God.

With all that’s going on in the world, we may be struggling with knowing how and when to help. Here is a prayer that will help us discern how to help when we don’t know what to do next. Check out the video prayer below.

A portion of this devotion is an excerpt from an article by Kristine Brown, “What Is Scripture’s Answer to the Fear of Missing Out?” originally published on iBelieve.com.

What is God's Plan for Your Struggle?

It began as a simple phone call.

The moment she answered, my friend sensed something was wrong. And without asking for details about my situation, she offered to pray for me. Somehow she understood. She prayed for God to bring comfort and thanked Him for providing whatever I needed to walk through the trial. What she prayed for next, I will never forget.

“Father, thank you that when Kristine comes through this, you will allow her to encourage someone else going through the same struggle.”

What? Encourage someone else in their struggle? In the middle of my mess, the idea seemed impossible.

What does God say about struggles?

Is it God's plan for us to suffer? Am I the only one hurting like this? When we face life’s toughest battles, it’s easy to feel alone - like no one understands. That lie can keep us from experiencing the good work God has planned for us through the struggle. That’s why it is so important to not only thank Him for His goodness but also share about all He has done.

Let the redeemed of the Lord tell their story—those he redeemed from the hand of the foe, those he gathered from the lands, from east and west, from north and south.” Psalm 107:2-3

When circumstances seem at their absolute worst, encouraging someone else is far from my mind. If I’m searching for strength to get through my day, how can I possibly offer help to another person?

What does God say about his plans for us?

It’s in those uncertain times that we find hope in God’s promise in Romans 8:28. He works all things together for good for those who love Him. All things, even the yucky stuff. Even in the struggle. And although I might not feel like it at that moment. There will be a day when God will open the door for me to share my victory and encourage a friend with His faithfulness.

“Let them sacrifice thank offerings and tell of his works with songs of joy.” Psalm 107:22

I hesitated before calling my friend that day because I thought I had to face my challenge alone. Her response changed that. We praised. We thanked Him. She told me how God had provided for her, broken chains, healed sickness, and brought peace to her storms. What an encouragement!

Are you needing God’s provision today? Do you need to know there is a plan beyond the struggle? That simple phone call with my friend taught me a valuable truth.

When you find yourself asking “What is God's Plan for My Struggle?” remember not to struggle alone. Yesterday’s victory for someone else can bring hope to your struggle today. And one day, you will be able to offer the same encouragement to another.